Hellooo

Well, it has been probably a year since I’ve blogged here, or anywhere for that matter. The short version is I went through six months of depression, one month of ECT, received a late stage lyme diagnosis and had heart complications over the summer. Things got better, but worse again (lyme) and I think I have a title for my next book:  “I’ve been Lymed”.  What do you think?  So now I’ve got the physical and the mental illness and it feels swell.

Sorry to bore you. I did have one fantastic month, July, where the antibiotic was kicking ass and I felt better than I had in probably two or so decades. It was glorious! I woke up at 6:00 or 7:00 am, after a perfect 8 hours, and walked 1.5 to 2 miles. I’d get a bunch of work done with the clearest head since I don’t know when. Thankfully, I worked hard because I applied for grants and got one. That is how I am now out of medical debt. Hallelujah! Now, if I could pay off the cars, the house and the credit cards, well that would be a miracle of epic proportions.

In the meantime, all the mental health holidays have whizzed by without any mention from me. It’s okay, right? I’m busy writing a book, a blog for BPHope and Huff Post and really trying to focus on DinerGirl.  My mom thinks I’m afraid of it because I’m a perfectionist. Well…I’m sure that’s part of it, but it’s a nightmare.  When I wrote INCJB, I had an intense, writer/editor boot camp style so once I had my first 150, the skeleton (with some meat on it), once I had that, it flowed nicely to finish in several months. The second book was a collaboration. So this one, this one will be a bear. Plus, I started it right before Hurr Sandy decided to level our area and office turned in to recovery and hotel bed and then 2nd book contract came. Do you see where I’m going with this? It’s hard to keep enthusiasm going for an Achilles heel type of book. I hope I get motivated again, and soon, because that is the book I must finish before I attack the others.

And I really want to write again…I’m not feeling the editing. Maybe I’ll divide my day so I can.

Anyhoo, aren’t you thrilled you tuned in? I’m so boring these days. My big excitement is that I started yoga again. *(Thank you, Groupon.)  I wasn’t in love with being six inches from all neighbors, or the Madonna infused soundtrack (what happened to calm music?) or the shouting teacher, but I kept saying ‘this class only cost $3.90.’ Again, thank you, Groupon. You rock. And so, I can try another place when I’m done. Damn Sandy literally blew through and out my favorite yoga studio in Sea Bright. (Even the post office never came back.) There’s finally some clothing store there but not Bhrama Yoga. I’m terribly sad and really noticing it now when I am trying to find a replacement.

Ah well, you can’t have it all. Right?  I’ll settle for good mental health…until winter comes. For now you better believe I’ve got my light box on!!!!!  🙂